Most Embarrassing Gig You Ever Played?

tdanb2003 · **Posted:** Tue Feb 02, 2010 12:52 pm

OUCH Invader stay away from your bass player. He's got some subconcious thing going on with his bass and your face....

Truly I feel your pain but I've not lost a tooth yet... although I have had a lighting tree try to disconnect my collarbone from my shoulder.

UK Jedi Knight · **Joined:** Sat Feb 28, 2009 10:10 am **Posts:** 27

Errrr....

How about a charity fundraiser with an Elvis impersonator who was in recovery from a stroke.

He ended the gig, with a goodnight to the somewhat elderly audience with the immortal lines..

"And rememeber, you could wake up tommorow morning having had a stroke". Goodnight folks!"

Which of course has many a meaning.

The audience looked like this.

:shock:

It shouldn't make me laugh but I know I'm gonna burn in hell..... :twisted:

soggycrow · **Joined:** Mon Oct 06, 2008 10:57 am **Posts:** 602

Played a gig on the deck out back of a bar/restaurant. By the fourth set everybody was well-lubricated, so we were playing better and better. Suddenly this chick fell flat on her face right in front of us. She left with assistance.

Later heard that it was her "coming out" day - as in getting out of jail. I guess she had been locked up for a year so it had to be a felony.

Next month, exact same thing happened - same chick. I don't know what she was celebrating this time.

soggycrow · **Joined:** Mon Oct 06, 2008 10:57 am **Posts:** 602

Different band. This band plays mostly nursing homes as a sort of charity deal/service project/ministry.

This woman walks through the audience area with a walker and falls down at the rear of the audience. They didn't touch her because you never know about possible spinal injuries. We kept playing. The EMT shows up with all their equipment. We stopped so they could get by. They put her on the cart and took her out to the ambulance.

Eerie.

DetroitBlues · **Joined:** Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:58 am **Posts:** 2187

Invader.CC wrote:

After almost 20 years of being in different traveling bands i should right a book on embarrassing gigs ..But this is a recent one that's happened twice in the last year.....

To set this up i play in a Rock'n Blues Band..We are a 6 piece full time band....Plus on recordings and larger higher paying gigs we also bring in two horn players for a 8 piece band...So the stage can get real tight at times...

I am responsible for Vocals ,Rhythm Guitar and general front of the stage action....So i have a tendency to move around a lot....So about a year ago the sound wasn't what i wanted...It sounded dull like the bass wasn't coming threw ..So i walked back and spoke with the sound man at the back corner...

I then went up to say something to our bass player about it ..When i got right by his left shoulder and started leaning in to talk to him about it.. He did the typical move of pulling up and back on the bass in time with the music ..

This was very unfortunate for me as my front teeth were also in the same space as the heedstock of his bass..It's not hard to figure out what happened..In the middle of the set i'm my knees spitting out blood and my front tooth is laying right in front of me..I was able to finish the gig ..Afterwords i got 4 stitches in my lip and 4 grand worth of dental repairs..

Fast Forward 6 months later

We are now ending a gig ..Same bass Player same guitar player(me)..The gig is over and i'm winding up chord and the bass player is talking to some Gal..I'm standing off his shoulder..Instead of undoing his strap he pull's the bass up and over his head and shoulder in one fast movement..

The only problem is...You guessed it?Yep, My mouth once again was occupying the same space as the body of his bass...The bass made solid contact again knocking out the implant that just cost me 4 grand to have installed 6 months prior..

I would start wearing a mouth guard but it's really hard to sing with it in my mouth...I have also suggested that the bass player put a foam covering over his bass but he refuses to do this..I have also asked the band for full coverage dental insurance but they are balking about the cost...But all i know is the pain and suffering of being in a blues band that believes in beating up there singer really sucks..And is very expensive..

Not to mention you'll start singing with a lisp.

jnastyNE · **Posted:** Wed Feb 03, 2010 10:59 pm

Jeez, I almost forgot the best one!
We played a youth conference at a Mormon church in Lincoln. We played mostly heavy stuff, but learned some lighter stuff for the conservative audience. We had a new bass player that had been playing for about a month, and he was no overnite pro, to say the least. On top of that we had 3 guitar players, a drummer guy on the keys, and a singer, so we were a huge band, and no one really new how to play.
I should mention that I was in Jr. High at the time.
Anyway, we bombed, big time. This guy even threw change at us. You have to be pretty bad to piss off a bunch of Mormons! To make matters even worse, the next band featured a young man named James Valentine (guitar player of Maroon 5), who was a talented young player, and a heart throb even in his early years. So everyone freaked out over them (I think the band was called Square), and made us sound that much worse.

msvolpe · **Joined:** Mon Jul 16, 2007 9:58 pm **Posts:** 387

not necessarily embarrassing, but more like awkward...

my band played a charity show for a community swim club fundraiser. it was held in this fancy dining room at a country club (i guess since this was during the winter when the swim club is closed).

needless to say, most of the guests were middle-aged or older. the "warm up" band was just a flutist accompanied by a piano playing some light jazzy stuff.

on comes our band, loud and proud. i was gigging my Pro Jr, but i felt absolutely restrained from "letting my hair down" when i saw this old lady sit down at a table RIGHT IN THE PATH OF MY SPEAKER'S ATTACK. not only that, but the table was front row to the "stage". (btw, the dance floor was in the middle of the room, not directly in front of us.) i was a bit uneasy all night because i was afraid to annihilate this kind elderly woman with my boom boom music.
we got told to turn down a couple times. i wouldn't have minded turning down a bit, i told the others of the request. they were pretty blitzed by this time and pretty much responded with the typical "F*** THAT, keep going. we ain't gonna turn down!" therefore, i could not turn down, since i'm the only guitarist. i mean i still wanted to be heard at least. i tried using lighter dynamics to compensate, which worked okay until the band noticed that my tone wasn't "dirty" enough.

anyway, examples of songs we played that best portray the awkward factor:
Freddy King - Goin Down (we play it heavy, ala Tommy Bolin)
Born To be Wild
Mississippi Queen
Rock Me Baby (in a way that Cream might do it, but think Hendrix, close enough)
STP - Plush and Interstate Love Song
AC/DC - TNT

by now you should see my point. we were spilling blood in a ballroom, and it felt very weird.

i think the only song that got any real positive reaction (aka dancing) was Midnight Hour by Wilson Pickett. When i saw this, i quickly signaled the band to extend the song, as this was not something i wanted to end soon. i think i sang the whole song over again.

texasguitarslinger · **Posted:** Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:37 pm

Last year (as in Dec. '08) my band played acoustically at an old folk's home around Christmas time. We played Christmas music and wore stupid reindeer/santa hats. It wasn't like we were playing to a bunch of poor little old ladies, this was a fairly upscale place. They had a professional polka band playing in the main room where everyone was awake and not drooling. We played the back rooms where people were either asleep or staring into space. They made drunk people look like an attentive audience. :lol:

Anyway, when we were packing up this one old lady comes right up to our drummer (who was regulated to a snare and brushes) and starts talking to him about "swing". She went on and on about how we needed to swing, and when she was done with drummer she moved on to my Dad, who was playing acoustic bass and finally on to the lead singer. And she was just grilling them. What didn't she get about the fact that we were a bunch of high school kids playing Christmas Carols, not Lawrence Welk?

And as the cherry on top, we backed the polka band on a few songs. They told us the wrong key, and I basically spent the whole time pretending like I was strumming my guitar and changing chords.

I don't want to play another gig in a retirement community until they want to hear some Hendrix. Then I'll be happy to. :lol:

stratgm · **Joined:** Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:22 am **Posts:** 27

While playing a show for a Family oriented event held by a popular chicken sandwich fast food chain, my bassist and lead singer break into"Something Stinks and I Want Some" routine in the middle of a Funk set. Just a wee bit inappropriate! Ever try hiding behind a Fender twin?

DetroitBlues · **Joined:** Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:58 am **Posts:** 2187

stratgm wrote:

While playing a show for a Family oriented event held by a popular chicken sandwich fast food chain, my bassist and lead singer break into"Something Stinks and I Want Some" routine in the middle of a Funk set. Just a wee bit inappropriate! Ever try hiding behind a Fender twin?

That's awesome!!!! I bet you can laugh about it now!!!

Chicagoblue · **Posted:** Fri Feb 05, 2010 7:41 pm

I don't get to gig out much at all. (probably a good thing) But I get to play at a place in Milwaukee once a year for a Birthday bash where they hire a Blues Band and the various rookies get called up to play a bit. I had just finished playing with the band and we were on break. Up comes an Old Timer Blue's guitar player who I had seen in previous years lerking around the room watching and then talking with the band. He came over to me while I was tuning and by myself and asks if he can play my Strat. I'm plugged into a Mesa Recto-Verb and I think I'm set up pretty simple. I think I had a chorus, delay and a tuner pedal. (wish I could tune by ear...not happening any time soon) So he starts to tell me about all the blues players he's played with over the years and that he was a second cousin to BB King and toured Europe. I believed him and sat there as he fiddled with my Strat and my gear genuinely interested and being respectful as he told his story.

He was, shall we say a bit inebriated and his voice was slurring a bit, but he goes from the stories about his storied career to start complaining about the gear. " I don't go much for them pedals, cuz it's all in the fingers ya know". That night I think I was brought a HM Strat because the songs that we learned were all Rock and Roll stuff. I would get to solo with the Blues band. (once they told me what key

He then starts to say that my Strat sucks because it wasn't a 63 "like the one he used to have". So he picks up another Strat nearby and I proceed to respectfully ask him if I could jam with him for a bit, that I was really interested to learn something from him. I start into a basic 12 bar blues riff and he stops playing, and says to me, "nope, I don't play with no amatuers" ! Still wanting to be respectful, I just looked at him, with a befuddled look on my face and said, "Uh OK, if that's the way you want it" and I just walked away, while he played through my amp. I sat down at the table with my friends, poured a beer while they asked me what the hell just happened.

Embarrassed and Ego bruised all in 5 minutes.

nikininja · **Posted:** Fri Feb 05, 2010 7:46 pm

So how did he play? I mean your from the land of blues. Forget country blues Chicago is where its all at for most of us brits.

You cant cut it in CHI then you aint goin nowhere far as were concerned. Its how us lot invaded.

Chicagoblue · **Posted:** Fri Feb 05, 2010 7:52 pm

Great question Niki. I meant to add that he wasn't that good. I mean you could tell that he at least had played and maybe in his younger days he may have been a little more, shall we say, accurate. I am sure the Wild Turkey he was drinking didn't help.

You are right, in Chicago, you normally can run across tons of excellent Blues players at the corner bar. For a moment there I thought maybe I was in place to get some of that fabled Robert Johnson Mojo to rub off without having to sell my soul. In the end, all I got was dismissed. Good thing playing is not my regular job.

nikininja · **Posted:** Fri Feb 05, 2010 8:05 pm

Chicagoblue wrote:

Great question Niki. I meant to add that he wasn't that good. I mean you could tell that he at least had played and maybe in his younger days he may have been a little more, shall we say, accurate. I am sure the Wild Turkey he was drinking didn't help.

You are right, in Chicago, you normally can run across tons of excellent Blues players at the corner bar. For a moment there I thought maybe I was in place to get some of that fabled Robert Johnson Mojo to rub off without having to sell my soul. In the end, all I got was dismissed. Good thing playing is not my regular job.

You shoulda unplugged him and told him to sling his hook. He'd have done no less in his 'heyday'. Thats why brits stopped coming to Chicago. All them old bluesmen gave our lot hell. Thats why you only got Taylor, Green and Clapton endorsed (as it were) by them in the late 60's.

If he came round here trying to play Muskrat Ramble with hokey chops, I'd sling him off. :lol:

thexrc · **Joined:** Wed Jan 27, 2010 7:46 pm **Posts:** 16

This thread is great!

At one show we were booked with five other bands, and we were the last to play. All you guys and gals know how that goes. Hours of absolute boredom for the most part...well not boredom just waiting, and waiting, waiting. So we finally go on and our drummer is wasted. Off time but playing enthusiastically until he falls off the stool and passes out. We tried to get him up but it was hopeless. Fortunately the crowd was mostly lubricated and thought it was funny, so he was carried off and we started doing shout out cover requests without drums instead of original songs for about 20 minutes, and asked audience members to come up and help sing the ones we didn't know all the words to. Actually that was one of the funnest gigging nights I can remember. This one tone deaf guy sang Back In Black and he thought he was awesome...and the crowd loved it..LOL! Thank the stars they were all drunk.

As a side note, for the next year we all played together the drummer never drank a drop until after the show. His fiancee tore his $@! up over that.

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