You are a musician if any of these has happened to you:

You realize that the cheers from the audience after a particularly
difficult passage are for a sports play on the big screen TV over the bar,
and that in fact, no one is listening to you.

When your most sincere, heartfelt comments are made by people that are drunk and who won't remember you in the morning.

When you are repeatedly told that the lead singer who can't read, never practices and has been singing for only six months is "The strongest part of the band", primarily because she has big ****.

When you are pleased that the pay for the gig, when looked at hourly from the time you leave your house to when you return meets minimum wage.

When someone comes up to you to tell you how much they love your playing, because they didn't think anyone played those things anymore.

You get to the gig to find out that nothing is comped, and you're
charged $15 to park.

When someone seeks you out to complement your playing as the "best bass player they have ever heard", and you're the guitar player.

When you realize that a small piece of equipment- such as a wireless mike you need- will take months of weekly gigs to pay for.

When you have to add $30 or $40 out of your pocket to find a sub, cause no one will cover you for what you are paid.

You aren't offended when all of the young wedding guests leave after the second set to dance to the DJ at a club down the street.

When you are told that you must play until the very end of when you were contracted for, when your only audience is the bartender, and you're being paid 40 or 50 bucks for the night.

When the bandleader or club owner wants to pay you in food or drinks, and you have $100,000 in school loans to pay off for that music degree.

When the guy collecting money at the door for the band's performance makes twice over the course of the evening what you do as one of the band members.

When as a member of a band you no longer even pretend to smile when asked to play "Free Bird".

When you know that other musicians who routinely claim they don't work for less than $100 a night only work a few times a year.

When people who are drunk tell you that what you are doing is
absolutely great and the best thing thing they have ever seen or heard, but refuse to pay more than $5 at the door.

When someone calling the cops for noise is a good thing. You get to go home early and you still get paid.

When you realize that asking women out that you meet on gigs doesn't work, for now they know you're a musician.

When you get invited to play the same gig the following year, which means that you don't have tear down after this year's gig.

When you have, for several years, been paid the same amount for a gig, but are afraid to say anything about it for fear that you might lose the gig.

When you spend more on the bar tab than you get paid for the gig.

When you finally have to resort to playing 'Mustang Sally' in order to get the audience dancing.

_________________
Being able to play and enjoy music is a gift that's often taken for granted.

Don't leave home without it!

I'm glad I don't gig. The passive rejection alone would kill me.

Dear Miami Mike,

Yes, to ALL of the above, and you didn't even get into the damage drunks can do to your gear, causing you to lose more in equipment damage than the whole gig was worth to the entire band.

I once played the Blue Horizon Ballroom in northern Minnesota after they had revamped the stage and put in 220V wiring. Unfortunately, one of the bartenders did the electrical work and he did it WRONG! When I plugged my master cord in and then turned on my PA system, I fried all of my electronics instantly - 220V into 110V gear. The only thing on the plus side was that I didn't need to use my smoke machine that night...

I do remember fondly those rare nights when some great looking chick pulled down the front of her puffy little blouse to let me see everything she had, plus a joint peeking out of her cleavage... too bad I wasn't into smoking anything back then... or now, for that matter.

I would also add:

When you finally get around to working up the song (Green Tambourine) that the loud drunk guy had demanded repeatedly at the top of his lungs the last four times he saw you play there... only to find out that he'd finally been banned from the club for being such am obnoxious drunk.

Or when your audience is forced to watch you because on the stage behind you is the biggest flat screen TV in the bar... and they leave the damn thing on the whole time you are playing!

God, yes I AM a musician. Why am I still gigging?

_________________
Dennis in CR
Rockin' since 1963

I remember one snowy evening we drove 80 miles to a gig over treacherous unplowed roads only to find out when we got to the club that the owner absolutely denied booking us and refused to let us play.We had no other choice but to turn around and drive back. We found out later that this was a regular scam she pulled, to book a band but if she could find a DJ to do the gig cheaper she would hire him and not even have the decency to tell the band.She was eventually Black Listed by The Musician's Union and eventually her club went bottom up when her clientelle went to a new club in a community about 5 miles away that had live entertainment,it looked good on the lying deceitful brute.

_________________
'65 Strat,65 Mustang,65 Jaguar,4 more Strats,3 vintage Vox guitars,5 Vox amps,'69 Bassman with a '68 2-15 Bassman cab,36 guitars total-15asst'd amps total,2 vintage '60s Hammond organs & a myriad of effects-with a few rare vintage ones.

Because we LOVE it......!





Arjay

_________________
"Here's why reliability is job one: A great sounding amp that breaks down goes from being a favorite piece of gear to a useless piece of crap in less time than it takes to read this sentence." -- BRUCE ZINKY

the best band i ever played in finally got the top spot at a popular club. we played the whole gig for the waitresses and bartenders. it was so empy most of them went home early. i knew this was going to happen but our guitarist insisted. we did get paid but i gave the money back before we left. funny thing is that we killed em' while opening for a popular band.
i'm glad our band now isn't gigging. our set list sucks and nobody wants to add anything new. i've gone back to playing heavy metal and i'm lovin' it. my neighbor, not so much.

i spotted a blackstar amp in the photo Arjay. i got one just like it.

This is great - - stories from the road - - keep 'em coming!

I remember booking a 4 nighter at a club and after the 3rd night the club owner said that he had a private function the following night and to take our gear out and he'd still pay us the 4 night price.

We didn't find out until the next day that the club burned down during the
night but his check was good. I'll bet that he collected well from his insurance!

Yeah, keep adding your own experiences...many of us can relate.

_________________
Being able to play and enjoy music is a gift that's often taken for granted.

Don't leave home without it!

Mike! I am not a musician . . . at least not yet . . . . but those were some funny true life case scenarios! Which is why my favorite movies will always be Spinal Tap!

no, musicians have talent.

_________________
1984 Squier Contemporary Stratocaster
1986 Peavey Envoy 110
1967 Kingston Acoustic

Back in 1979 I was playing with a guitar player and singer named Marlin Price (Marlin, if you're out there, drop me a line). Marlin had managed to get an every-weekend job, playing Friday and Saturday nights at a place call the Inspiration Peak Supper Club (got to be a song in there...), but he was tired of doing it as a solo act, so he groomed me as his accomplice.

In the beginning I mainly played my old Tele bass and sang harmony with Marlin, but gradually I also played second guitar and sang a few leads. Marlin was quite specific as to who was the "star" of the show, but I had no problem with that. I was making about $80 a weekend playing second fiddle, but that wasn't bad in '79. I was also learning a lot of great old-time and cowboy tunes.

I lived about 20 miles north of Inspiration Peak and Marlin lived about 6 miles north, so I always drove down and picked him up on the way. One day I swung into Marlin's driveway and hit the horn, but Marlin wasn't waiting on the porch. I got out and went to the door and knocked, but still nothing. I finally got down, walked around and looked in a window - the place was completely cleaned out.

Now a lesser man might have just turned around and gone back home, but I was young and dumb, so I drove on down to the club and found Irv, the owner. I told him my sad story, that good old Marlin was long gone and what the heck should I do? He looked me up and down and said, you're here, the stage is there, you need to get up there and start singing in about 20 minutes. I was a little afraid of Irv, truth be told, so I did what he said.

I got up there, pulled the PA, such as it was, out from behind the stage curtains and I faked my way through three hours of singing and playing. Irv gave me a thumbs-up and said he'd see me the next night. Did I mention that I was pretty much scared shitless the whole time I was up there alone? Saturday, before the night's gig, I worked by butt off, getting material down and organized, so I could do a lot better job of playing alone up there. And I did.

I ended up playing that Supper Club from the summer of 1979 through most of 1983, gradually moving up to $200 a weekend, which helped pay for my beginning G.A.S. I later found out that Marlin, who was a realtor, had figured out that he could make a lot more money if he sold lake cottages and farm houses two or three times, instead of just once. I heard he left the state with a real estate fraud warrant nipping at his heels. Still, he got me into my first house gig and that incredible experience made me the great player that I am today.

Okay, great might be an overstatement.

_________________
Dennis in CR
Rockin' since 1963

Or are we just addicted to the thrill?

_________________
Dennis in CR
Rockin' since 1963

We were the "house band" for a very short time at a local pub. We'd play a couple weekends a month and would host open mic nights in the midweek sometimes. This was a few years ago. Maybe '04 or '05. We lucked out and got another gig on one of the nights night the pub hired another band so we got our gear out to play the gig. Several days after that other gig the pub employees opened up one day to find the place had been emptied by the owners overnight and they were gone. They must have backed a truck up to the door because they took everything that wasn't bolted down. Skipped town never to be heard from again, leaving a string of debts around town and a bunch of unpaid employees and bands. Somehow we were the only band that had been paid every time and we always got paid in cash right there after the show. We all congratulated ourselves for having sidestepped having our gear stolen by the pub and for not being out of pocket on the gigs.

Does that count?

_________________

Just think of how awesome a guitar player you could have been by now if you had only spent the last 10 years practicing instead of obsessing over pickups and roasted maple necks.

What's the difference?





Arjay

_________________
"Here's why reliability is job one: A great sounding amp that breaks down goes from being a favorite piece of gear to a useless piece of crap in less time than it takes to read this sentence." -- BRUCE ZINKY

What size is that bass drum? 30"?

_________________
1984 Squier Contemporary Stratocaster
1986 Peavey Envoy 110
1967 Kingston Acoustic

Hey Arjay I can't throw darts if the band is set up in front of the boards....or can I?

Funny post Mike I have experienced a few of those scenarios...