i'm done (whiny rant)

Ceri · **Posted:** Fri Jun 22, 2012 3:41 pm

Hi jeebus.

jeebus wrote:

i wish i had Mr. Ceri's writing skills.

Hahaha - get outta here! :lol:

jeebus wrote:

...something that gets folks dancing or at least on thier feet. selfishly, i enjoy seeing folks dance.

It's happened too few times for me but when it does it's one of the best pleasures there is. Worth getting up there for. On the other hand, if it ain't working that way then -

jeebus wrote:

am i being a selfish, arrogant spoiled rotten horses arse?

- definitely not.

Jeebus, so many sensible posts on this thread there's little to add. For starters, this is very fine:

Hou-Tex wrote:

If it's not "fun" anymore, don't do it! Life is too short to do otherwise. When the day ends, it's all about you and your family and when the day begins, be thankful you and your loved ones woke up also.

Everything else is "Gravy".

A truer word was never spoken.

However:

jeebus wrote:

i'm done with it.

Good. So is it a done deal? How did they take it?

From what I'm understanding there's no big animosity as such between you and the others? So were they OK with it? Everyone happy to move on?

And what next? I think there's nothing wrong with playing by yourself for your own enjoyment. But music with others is also very nice. Anyone else around you could hook up with, even if just to jam with of an evening or summat?

Look to the future. Make something happen. Not essential, but it might be fun.

Whatever, best of luck - C

Ceri · **Posted:** Fri Jun 22, 2012 4:10 pm

Oh, by the way:

Solid Body Love Songs wrote:

The world needs all of the good vibes available.

Gosh, I hope I get to meet you some day, Rollie. I just think a day with you in it will be a fine, bright one!

Cheers - C

tdanb2003 · **Posted:** Fri Jun 22, 2012 5:10 pm

Jeebus glad you resolved your problem. I hesitated to reply after reading that you decided to leave the band. My gripe is quite the opposite of yours. I play guitar in the contemporary praise band in our Church. We are a 7 piece band not including the backup vocalists and occasional brass section. We are constantly adding new music to our repetoire. I hate it when we learn a great new song, everything is coming together musically after we've performed it several times then boom its over, and off it goes into my accordion file of lead sheets to be pulled out 2 or 3 months later after I've completely forgotten my parts. :roll:

We are the ultimate cover band... It can be very aggravating, but we don't have to play 3 hour sets either...

babalooga · **Joined:** Tue Mar 16, 2010 4:21 pm **Posts:** 581

Jeebus , if it aint fun you're better off cutting wood all weekend. tdanb2003, I'm in the same situation as you are, but I like the challenge. I like to play different music instead of the same set list week after week. I also am playing with a band that I used to be with a few years back, and these guys are doing some of the same songs we did before I left :lol:

.
The main thing is I am having a butt load of fun, and my wife gets rid of me a few hours every week :roll:

.

NonniG · **Posted:** Sat Jun 23, 2012 6:49 am

I have to disagree with those who say that quitting is never an option. I you mean your head can only handle that much rock beating. In Iceland a mans wisdom can be judged by the fact that he knows when it is time to put the oars back into the boat (meaning giving up) and a dumb person will try and try over again without changing anything. It doesn't mean that you should give up everytime, but if you have tried everything and the result is alway the same and you are unhappy then quit, go onto open mics, search for jampartners on graiglist or in local papers, just do something that makes you happy. Life is too short to not pursuit happiness.

PS. Try not to burn bridges behind you. In your pursuit of happiness you might have to take a step back.

schnepf13 · **Posted:** Sat Jun 23, 2012 12:40 pm

There are indeed times when you do have to call it quits. I had a band a couple years back that also included a family member, along with a couple of friends from work.

Things started off great but we eventually stagnated. We had some disagreements over musical direction, how often to practice, song arrangements and song selection. After about a year or so we started spinning our wheels.

Then my daughter was born, and that meant much less time for me to devote to the band. Practice sessions got fewer and farther between, and eventually we were just wasting money by renting a rehersal space we were only using a couple of times a month. So we decided to dis-band the band. It was a little disappointing, but we're all still friends and, one year year later, I think we all agree it was the right move.

If you truly feel you've taken things with the band as far as it will go, it's probably best to move on. Hopefully another opportunity will come up in the not-too-distant future that will be a beter fit for everyone involved.

asgeirman · **Posted:** Sat Jun 23, 2012 3:31 pm

chef wong wrote:

Some people might say you're less of a musician, if not in a band. I feel that way.

Disagree. It usually is very satisfying, funny, interesting, developing and social being in a band. But it has happened to me - a couple of times, in fact - the band has been playing music of which I had no feeling for/or relation to. One time I split the band , the other I left. These days I use my time making new music, occasionally gig alone or as duo. Plan to make a new band with some members of the first mentioned band - if they agree to do it MY way :mrgreen:

I feel much better leaving those bands- feel I can evolve freely. So IMO it is wise of you , Jeebus, to get out of that band , and perhaps get into a band that suits you better- or as you put it : Play with yourself :lol:

- I do

guitslinger · **Posted:** Sat Jun 23, 2012 3:56 pm

It seems to me that your band mates have become tired and bored with playing too but took a different approach than you did by becoming uninterested and complacent. The simple fact that they aren't willing to learn more songs to put into your sets list shows that they don't have any interest in the band.I think that it's time to call it a day and that would be best for all of you.The fact that you all think highly of one another is probably why everyone is still staying in the band-each one of you is afraid to calll it quits in order to spare the feelings of the others-maybe they're all waiting for someone else to make the first move.You can make the first move by stating first that you think the world of your bandmates and consider them your best friends but playing has become more of a chore than an enjoyable pass time.You may be surprised by each one of them saying that they have felt the same way but couldn't find a way to say it.

Like several others have said-when it stops being fun it's time to pack it in.You never know but a few months down the road,after a break you all may decide to make a new go of it and build up a whole new repetoire or you may even find a whole new bunch of guys on your wavelength.

Tochai · **Posted:** Sat Jun 23, 2012 5:06 pm

This thread reminded me of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFohA6mKFjc. At least it could be worse. :lol:

Solid Body Love Songs · **Posted:** Sun Jun 24, 2012 7:05 am

Tochai wrote:

This thread reminded me of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFohA6mKFjc. At least it could be worse. :lol:

"thanks lindsey" :lol:

Solid Body Love Songs · **Posted:** Wed Jun 27, 2012 8:22 am

Ceri wrote:

Oh, by the way:

Solid Body Love Songs wrote:

The world needs all of the good vibes available.

Gosh, I hope I get to meet you some day, Rollie. I just think a day with you in it will be a fine, bright one!

Cheers - C

Thank you Ceri, me too you Bro !! My drummer is playing with SSD in Brooklyn at some place that I don't know the name of, lol, we are getting closer a little at a time.

nicebassbro · **Joined:** Sun Apr 29, 2012 7:47 am **Posts:** 200

jeebus wrote:

i'm done with our band. at my age and talent level, i'm about 99% sure this will be my last. i'm cool with that. if i may i'd like to explain why.
in the last 3 years we've added, maybe, 6 new tunes to the set list. i'm the only one who ever suggests anything new. when i say new, i mean stuff from the 70's other than the current standards we do from the same (era?). i wish i had Mr. Ceri's writing skills. anyway, i've always thought it was better to discuss, as a band, what tunes were sleepers and should be dropped for something new and better. when i say better, i mean something that gets folks dancing or at least on thier feet. selfishly, i enjoy seeing folks dance. i can't, thats why i play guitar, or at least attempt to.
we practice late on sundays. sometimes this is my only day off. i can promise you this wouldn't bother me at all if it were necessary. we play the same stuff, make the same mistakes and just carry on like nothing is awry. whats the point? i love these guys very, very much but i'm done with it.

am i being a selfish, arrogant spoiled rotten horses arse? i know that i am an a-holorama but i get bored very easy. especially with music.

thanks everyone. i hope at least 1 person has been in my situation. i make no money playing music. i do it for fun and hope someone listening is having fun. it ain't fun no more.

signed, whiny beastard.

In my personal experiences. I have been in a TON of different bands man! I know how you feel, and it sucks. I have learned from my mistakes though. here is the key to a successful band. If it works, stick to it..don't quit. If it doesn't work, then just be honest with yourself..and leave the band as quick as you can. Though always have a backup plan. i also know what you mean though, about being done..Ive been playing in bands since i was 17, i am now 32. I love playing in bands..i love teamwork, i love being a part of a crew. Its an amazing feeling being in a great tight band. And thats why i haven't thrown in the towel yet. because of the great joys i get out being a part of a good band.

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