Didn't fly Ryanair then?

They ought rename to Buddy Holly Airlines. I've never enjoyed landing so much.

Conversely to my fly out experiences at Stanstead. My return was significantly easier.
Didn't get stopped once, not to see my passport, not to question me about anything. Just picked my flightcase up from the luggage-go-round and walked out the airport.

Quite worrying that they want to keep all the potential terrorists from leaving the country. And will allow new ones to enter with no fear of detection.

_________________
No no and no

Actually, we did.

Odd thing about Ryanair: it's never quite as bad as you've worked yourself up to be ready for - that's a little trick they've got going on with their image. You're ready for utter, suicidal despair and in the end it's just mild torture and you walk away thinking; "Oh well, it wasn't the end of the world".

Still hate them though.

Cheers - C

_________________

Last time, I was sat on the wing.
I swear I saw them flapping.

_________________
No no and no

Theres some classic stuff on here, good thread! I`ll write out a few of mine, unsure how S.Tap they are, but just a few of the things that have amused me in my gigging life.

- Once played in a 10 piece hip hop/breakbeat group, great fun and gave me the chance to play loads of the sort of venues that wouldn’t normally allow most of the more rock orientated bands Ive played in anywhere near their shiny stage. Bass player was a real essex geezer, bit of a character to say the least. I`ll just call him geezer here, for the good reason that it was what we all called him. We once played at an outdoor rave down on the south coast of England (winspitt caves near worth matravers for any brits who know the area) and played a set as the sun rose the morning after the main party, but most of the fun was throughout the night, geezer needed to find somewhere to empty his bowels at some point in the night so wandered off and found what he thought was a suitably quiet and untouched cave in which to do his business. He managed it impeccably, even brought some leaves with him to wipe afterwards, only problem was when he`d finished and tried to leave the cave, turned out everyone at the party had been using this cave for the same reason, so he then slipped on two or three gifts on the floor and ended up falling down into a whole pile of the stuff! First we knew of it was seeing him shuffle back to the party wearing nothing but his muscle vest tied on like a nappy as he`s thrown the rest of his clothes away!! He played the gig like that and never lived it down!!

- Still at the cave rave, we drove the band and all our gear there in the band `ambulance` which was an old ambulance we’d converted into our band wagon, was great it was, I miss that van. Anyway it turned out the party was a health and safety nightmare, and no less than 3 people got so intoxicated they literally fell off the cliffs to the rocks below. Luckily there was some major drugs going round and all 3 were so relaxed that they did themselves very little injury beyond heavy bruising. Anyway what made me laugh was how people kept getting carried in to our band ambulance for some reason, so instead of being cared for by paramedics they woke up surrounded by a load of hash smoking party goers staring down at them and giggling at what they had just done! They had no idea what was going on, and the paramedics found it all rather strange when they eventually turned up!

- Back to Geezer, there was once the time whilst playing a London squat party in the early hours of the morning that he got so into his grooving in front of a load of girls down the front that he grooved right off the stage, all we knew was that he suddenly disappeared and the bass stopped! It was only at the end of the song that the MC and me wandered over to his corner of the stage and saw him sprawled broken on the floor in obvious pain. Credit to him though, that geezer still greeted us with a thumbs up and a `whatcha boys, what songs next?`

- Then there’s my old 3 piece rock band, we once got to support a certain big rock band that formed from soundgarden and RATM when they first came to Britain, only problem was that their rock star singer (who we were quite looking forward to meeting) is a recovered alcoholic, now why should we have a problem with that you ask? Turns out their F*ing security were all over us constantly making sure we didn’t crack open a single beer whenever chris was anywhere around us, it was ridiculous. Then one of their meathead personal security men came and told us if we didn’t move our `piece of sh*t van` right away it was going to get a brick through the window, nice. No asking us once first or anything. Never meet your heroes. We won in the end though, kerrang magazine said we were better than the headliners, result.

- This last one is one of my favourites, and I would like to add a disclaimer first of all to say that I am really a nice guy and not a thief….. but anyway it happened. In the hip hop group with the geezer on the bass we once did a tour of the student balls (great circuit to get onto if you ever can) all across Britain. At one place (cant even remember where) we had a storming gig and I think we were actually headlining, anyway, as soon as we finished security proceeded to get everyone out of this outdoor marquee thing very quickly. Before you knew it we were COMPLETELY alone in this vast outdoor tent, no bar staff, no security, no stage hands, nothing. We packed up our gear (having already been payed) and headed for the ambulance to get home. It was only in the ambulance on the way back that I hesitantly said….`er guys, I feel a bit bad…. But when the room emptied I pocketed an SM58`. The whole van went silent until one of the singers said `what?! Seriously, I got an SM57?!?`, then the drummer piped up with `no!! I got me 4 XLR leads and a drum mic`. You get the picture, it turned out that without coordinating a thing the entire band all individually grabbed the opportunity to get as much as we could into our pockets! We honestly felt awful as we’d all thought we were the only one doing it and would be treated like heroes, instead we sheepishly headed home and luckily never heard from the university again. Jeez, I laugh about it now, but I felt awful. What’s worse is I never did get my sm58 back when I left the band not long after, and I could really do with it now!! Moral is, security aint just there to look over the students, they should watch the band every now and then too!

Olly

_________________
`I prefer not to listen to music that I can't rip off or improve on` - Ian Dury

Bassist? Geezer?

no, can't be..

You didn't ever play In Bham did you?

_________________
Fender Highway & Classic 60s Strats, Fender Toronado, Telecaster, Gretsch Projet, Charvel 3, PRS SE Soapbar II & Custom 24, Burns Batwing and many others!

may well have done! Im unsure, theres always a good chance they played up there in between me leaving and the geez being kicked out. Why Im intruiged....

_________________
`I prefer not to listen to music that I can't rip off or improve on` - Ian Dury

Ew! This definitely wins the Yuk-Factor prize on this thread. Far as I'm concerned, that guy rides home strapped to the roof of the van, unless you happened to have a huge vat of disinfectant to dunk him in first, which I have a kind of hunch you didn't.

BTW: it never crossed my mind that a roll of toilet paper was essential kit for the emergency guitar maintenance box, but now I think everyone should learn from this salutary tale.

Again: ew!

Cheers - C

_________________

LOL.. No worries.. Just me being speculative

As in, Geezer Butler - Bassist, Black Sabbath - Birmingham etc..

_________________
Fender Highway & Classic 60s Strats, Fender Toronado, Telecaster, Gretsch Projet, Charvel 3, PRS SE Soapbar II & Custom 24, Burns Batwing and many others!

im hangin my head in shame, you know id actually proudly call myself a sabbath fan as well! Well, the original line up anyway.

Im making up a `must try harder` sticker to slap on my forehead right now

_________________
`I prefer not to listen to music that I can't rip off or improve on` - Ian Dury

Shameful confession. I went raving there in the 90's. A couple of times.
First time.
All witches and druids doing things on altars. Till we got fed up and hijacked the desk.
Then a mate of mine, to make a real mockery of it went pirouetting across the altar.

Second time.
An old school friend who'd appeared on Crimewatch a couple of times. Also as an unrelated matter been banned from every Spa shop and Thresher off license in the UK. Had taken a load of ketamine before we got there.
All night long he keeps coming up to me saying "Nick see him over there, I recognize him. Who is he?".
"Who +++?".
Points in some direction "Him over there".
"+++ mate, you've just pointed to 15,000 people".
After it all dies down, I don't know how but I end up in some house in Folkstone. Three days later and decide to make my way back to the sunny midlands.
A couple of weeks later I bump into +++.
I ask him "did you find out who it was who you recognized?".
"Ah Nick I saw him at the end of Sunday night. So I went up, tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and guess what".
"What?".
"It was me!".

Drugs, they really mess you up. Particularly when their for horses.

_________________
No no and no

Erm well I did sort of think about giving it my best Marcel Marceu trapped in a glass box as I was infact inside a perspex box, but one look at the wife and the large airport security guys just looking for an excuse to get the rubber gloves on changed my mind

Another of my moments was staying in a Holiday Inn, getting plastered in the bar, saying goodnight all see you in the morning and getting back to the room...forward a few hours...to the "during the night" call of nature, now we all know rooms are en suite yep?, NO, not in my mind at that given moment in time, I thought I was at home so grabbed the first thing to cover my modesty which happened to be a small jacket just incase any of "our guests " got up as I'm an au natural sleeper and stepped outside the room into what I thought would be my hallway at home turn left and there's the bathroom NO!!!!!! Holiday Inn hallway YES!! just as reality hits my senses the door clicks shut behind me, so there I am bollock naked in a blind panic call of nature now screaming , first thought chap the mates doors , looks down the hallway..which door what if I get the wrong one , more panic ..need a plan B, toilet at the end of hallway, runs to the end you got it NO TOILET, need to get this jacket on any kind of way, sleeves pulled over legs.... nope it don't work...tied it around myself any old way just as long as everythings hidden and get yourself down to reception there's a toilet down there I was sure, Lift or Stairs..ruled out lift, door opens someone standing there , I'll take the stairs, so gets down and just as I'm opening the door in walks three guys in suits so did what anyone would do said " evening" and walks right out the door into the night...next thought the van, must be spare clothes in there except I'd emptied my jacket pockets in the room NO keys..call of nature still there by the way so straight into the nearby bushes nuff said......gave the guys who had arrived time to get out of the way and I'd get back in...wrong...while I was in the bushes another couple of guys had arrived at reception and were in the process of signing in by now I'm at the "F this" stage , " excuse me I seem to have locked myself out" I said to the guy on reception, who replied " I'll be with you in a moment sir" and left me standing looking out the window while he attended to the other folk signing in, handed them the room key swipecard then turned to me as though nothing out of the ordinary here "which room sir" gets his pass, takes me up the lift along the hallway without another word said, except there you are sir goodnight, I'm sure I'm now on some Holiday Inn training video for wayward guests, security cameras were everywhere I noticed coming out of those bushes

Comment utterly escapes me, I'm in shock...

Brilliant.

_________________
No no and no

Could have ended in complete disaster Nick there was a shift change between getting up to the room first time and the second praise the Lord, an attractive young receptionist was on duty earlier, the old guy on the night shift must have seen it all before

Wild stories Bros !!

_________________
you can save the world with your guitar one love song at a time it's just better, more fun, easier with a fender solid body electric guitar or electric bass guitar.