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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 8:44 am
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Amateur
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Joined: Mon Feb 13, 2012 11:33 am
Posts: 102
Worry never seems to help.
PRAYER always seems to help.

My thoughts and prayers go out for you, your Dad and your Mother.

(This is going to be very difficult for her also).

Pray for Her and you will feel better

L.A.
(Hugs)


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 8:47 am
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Aspiring Musician
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Joined: Mon Feb 09, 2009 12:58 pm
Posts: 382
Location: Lincoln NE
Just take it a step at a time. Its been years of hurting, so don't expect relationships to mend over night. Don't go in with any expectations, but be open to possibilities.
People can change, but sometimes they don't.....


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 2:44 pm
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Rock Star
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Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2009 12:01 pm
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Location: Halls of ikea
Hope everything works out for the best Tess, for all of your family, Best wishes


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 2:49 pm
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Roadie
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Joined: Wed Aug 17, 2011 7:20 am
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SKcoppertele wrote:
This is a hard thing to go through in your age. I should know,I am your age.it hurts when the smallest little things happen.I could only imagine what you are going through.


Honestly, it's not as hard as most would imagine. yeah, it's confusing, but not that hard, I guess that's what happens when you live with this reality for 7 years, there are rough patches, but it's still not that hard...

jnastyNE wrote:
Just take it a step at a time. Its been years of hurting, so don't expect relationships to mend over night. Don't go in with any expectations, but be open to possibilities.
People can change, but sometimes they don't.....


That's probobly the hardest part of it all. Over the years I've had so many pictures in my head of what I want her to be, I don't want to be let down....

L.A. wrote:
Worry never seems to help.
PRAYER always seems to help.

My thoughts and prayers go out for you, your Dad and your Mother.

(This is going to be very difficult for her also).


Pray for Her and you will feel better

L.A.
(Hugs)


That's probobly the hardest part of it all. Over the years I've had so many pictures in my head of what I want her to be, I don't want to be let down....


Thanks guys!

_________________
"He who hates me hates my Father as well."
John 15:23

Talman Ibanez Inner City-Suizy Q
2002 American-Made Fender Telecaster-Vengence
Fender Hot Rod Deluxe III


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 5:44 pm
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Professional Musician
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Joined: Wed Nov 11, 2009 6:35 pm
Posts: 1212
Location: No way
Hi , Tessa .
Sorry to hear about your problems. I guess your disappointed/angry feelings towards your mother might come from the fact that she left you. As a child it is difficult to see the reasons for that- just feeling betrayed, I guess.
Perhaps Your mother also feel she did betray and abandon you. She might feel very guilty and-ashamed . And of course that might prevent her from meeting you - she just might not dare.
I think you should meet her , and give her a chance . But - take your time - don't expect the meeting to be an immediate success . Time heals wounds- you might learn to know each other
again , perhaps in a new way. After all, she came out of prison earlier than expected- which possibly is because of good behavior! That again should indicate that she has learnt something from her stay there!
Of course there is a chance she has not changed at all. And if you find that out , you will be very disappointed- but : that's life , you just got to deal with it. ( I know a thing or two about bitches- at least, they exist ! ) Then it's good that the rest of your family supports you. You WILL make it anyway- disappointed or happy. Don't you ever let another person (family or others!) bring you down. It is now your duty to yourself to make the right choices to make yourself a good life , perhaps with a little guidance from your other relatives.
Best wishes - I'm with you in the spirit :)

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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 6:49 pm
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Aspiring Musician
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Joined: Tue Mar 16, 2010 4:21 pm
Posts: 581
Hi Tessa, forgiveness is a very hard thing to do sometimes, but it is a great healing tool for both parties involved. My youngest son ran away from home when he was 17. when he left said and did some awful hurtful things to his mom and me.

He returned home after 13 long years of not knowing if he was dead or alive (lots of sleepless nights around our place). He was very ashamed of what he had done, but we welcomed him with open arms and forgave him. We started fresh, what was done in the past stayed in the past. You can't put the toothpaste back in the tube, so we just moved on from there.

Not every situation has a happy ending, but you won't know until you try. Best wishes and much love and prayers sent your way.


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 8:56 am
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Rock Star
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Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2007 9:44 am
Posts: 7282
Location: Washington
You can choose your friends, but you can't choose you family.

Good luck with your mother.

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My other guitar is a Strat.

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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:02 pm
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Roadie
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Joined: Wed Aug 17, 2011 7:20 am
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Thanks for all the support guys!!!
It really means alot!

orvilleowner wrote:
You can choose your friends, but you can't choose you family.


hah! Ain't that the truth!

Thanks!
Tessa♥

_________________
"He who hates me hates my Father as well."
John 15:23

Talman Ibanez Inner City-Suizy Q
2002 American-Made Fender Telecaster-Vengence
Fender Hot Rod Deluxe III


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 6:47 pm
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Rock Icon
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Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 10:03 am
Posts: 9449
Location: NL Canada
I really feel for you Tessa,you're much too young to have such a difficult situation to deal with.The main thing is not to rush things ,either way or one or even both could end up being hurt.She has paid her debt to society and probably being incarcerated gave her the chance to avail of programs and counselling that helped her change for the better.Just take your time and tread carefully.Best of luck,we are all in your corner as we all care very much for you.Derek.


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 10:15 pm
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Rock Star
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Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:33 am
Posts: 4583
Location: North of Pittsburgh
You're a remarkable young lady Tessa. So many comment on your age. I have to join the club, you're mature beyond your years and are determined. The advice about finding a person to help you work this out is good. A psychologist would be a good idea. Perhaps your school could help.

You know we're all pulling for you.

Wishing nothing but the best for you and yours.


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 11:44 pm
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Joined: Thu Jan 20, 2011 2:00 pm
Posts: 3063
Tessa, "Forgiving does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Instead, forgiving what we cant forget creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of our past into a hope for the future". (Lewis B. Smedes)
----Danny,


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Post subject: Re: Reality Check.
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 12:36 am
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Roadie
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 4:26 pm
Posts: 207
wow

i really dont know what to say. i hope for your sake that it turns out good


wishing you well


ZAC


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