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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 11:11 am
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I can't think of any musician jokes and it's not fair because look at all of the posts on this thread and every one on here has a musician joke except me so far and I have thought about that since the last time that I saw this thread and then thought if someone would tell me a musicians joke then I could post as if it were my musician joke but then everyone would know that you whoever told me and then I posted it everyone would then know, oh forget about it.

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 3:41 pm
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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 4:42 pm
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Solid Body Love Songs wrote:
I can't think of any musician jokes and it's not fair because look at all of the posts on this thread and every one on here has a musician joke except me so far and I have thought about that since the last time that I saw this thread and then thought if someone would tell me a musicians joke then I could post as if it were my musician joke but then everyone would know that you whoever told me and then I posted it everyone would then know, oh forget about it.

Don't feel bad, Rollie...this post made me laugh more than some of the jokes in this thread.

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 5:03 pm
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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2015 6:08 pm
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We once had another 'joke' thread but have not been able to locate that one. So although this technically is not a joke about musicians, a musician posted it lol

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a policewoman, who was also a blonde.

The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and as she searched was getting progressively more agitated.

"What does it look like?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied "It's square and it has your picture on it."

The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is" she said.

The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, " Ok, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop,,,,"

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2015 8:12 pm
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Guitar players get the girls and bass players... get to play bass

How can you tell if your bass player is an ex-guitar player that couldn't find a band? He's playing a bass.


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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2015 8:40 am
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No clue how I ever missed this thread (some LOVELY responses there...can't wait to read it to my wife)...either way, better late than never. Here's my contribution;

Q: What's the difference between a guitar player and a large pepperoni pizza?

A: The pizza can feed a family of 4.


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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Sat Aug 29, 2015 4:03 pm
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For the drummers out there. :D
Why are lead guitarists always the last ones to be ready on stage?

They can't figure out which end of the cable goes into the amp and which end goes into the guitar. (That's why they need roadies). :lol:

That's also why I leave my cord plugged in. :wink:

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Sat Aug 29, 2015 4:23 pm
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A suspicious van is pulled over by an inquisitive State Trooper. Waffs of smoke and smell of grass engulf the trooper's nasal passages.

He looks at the band and tells them not to move. He checks out their ID at the cruiser.

It's been a busy day for the trooper and he only has room in his car for one more arrest.

Which band member would get arrested? The guitar player, the bass player, the drummer, the keyboard player, or the singer, and why?

The singer because he has a rap sheet a mile long. :D

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Sun Aug 30, 2015 6:13 pm
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Solid Body Love Songs wrote:
We once had another 'joke' thread but have not been able to locate that one.


Maybe it was my other joke thread?
About Redneck words?

http://forums.fender.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=74159

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Thu Sep 10, 2015 5:22 pm
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I saw this on a friends FB page,

Letter from a professional guitar player to the "Dear Abby" help column in a newspaper.

Dear Abby...

I think my wife is cheating on me. I am a working musician and, as you would expect, travel a lot. I have been noticing strange things happening when I get home. Her mobile phone rings and she steps outside to answer it or she says, "I'll call you back later". When I ask her who called she gets evasive.

Sometimes she goes out with friends but comes home late, getting dropped off around the corner and walking the rest of the way.

I once picked up the extension while she was on the phone and she got very angry.

A buddy of mine plays guitar in a band. He told me that my wife and some guy have been to his gigs. He wanted to borrow my guitar amp. That's when I got the idea to find out for myself what was really happening. I said "sure, you can use my amp but I want to hide behind it at the gig and see if she comes into the venue and who she comes in with". He agreed.

Saturday night came and I slipped behind my Marshall JCM800 half stack to get a good view. I could feel the heat coming off the back of the amp. It was at that moment, crouching down behind the amp, that I noticed that one of the tubes was not glowing as bright as the other three.

Is this something I can fix myself or do I need to take it to a technician?

Thanks,

Very Concerned.

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Thu Sep 10, 2015 5:27 pm
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BMW-KTM wrote:
Solid Body Love Songs wrote:
We once had another 'joke' thread but have not been able to locate that one.


Maybe it was my other joke thread?
About Redneck words?

http://forums.fender.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=74159


Matt, that one and the thread for talking dog jokes which I can not locate. :lol:

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 2:37 pm
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Someone sent me this one this morning ... an oldie, but a goodie: :D

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 2:41 pm
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:lol:

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Post subject: Re: Musician Jokes .... feel free to add some.
Posted: Mon Apr 03, 2017 9:06 pm
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Who told me this joke?
Solid Body Love Songs wrote:
A Forum member wrote this a long time ago

"So. A talking dog walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman is most surprised; "Amazing! A talking dog - who'd have thunk? Here's your drink." The dog drinks up and leaves.

Next day the barman is at work and a guy comes in who from his attire is obviously the showmaster in a circus - he's wearing a top hat, tails, a spangly vest, etc. As the barman is setting up the guy's drink he mentions; "You work in a circus? You should have been in here yesterday. I served a drink to someone I'm sure you'd like to meet - a talking dog!"

The guy says; "Yeah really? Amazing! If that talking dog comes in again please ask him to come and see me. I believe I could offer him a job..."

Next day the barman is working when in comes the talking dog again. As the barman is pouring his drink he says; "Yesterday there was a guy in here who would very much like to meet you. He's the ringmaster in a circus."

The talking dog takes a pull on his drink and says; "Oh yeah? Why - does he need a trombone player?" "
had to have at least one trombone player joke lol.

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