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Post subject: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 11:54 am
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An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband's libido..

'What about trying Viagra?' asked the doctor.

'Not a chance', she said. 'He won't even take an aspirin.'

'Not a problem,' replied the doctor. 'Give him an 'Irish Viagra'. It's when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.'

It wasn't a week later when she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to her progress. The poor dear exclaimed, 'Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! T'was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!'

'Really? What happened?' asked the doctor.

'Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent me cups flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there passionately on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!'

'Why so terrible?' asked the doctor, 'Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't good?'

'Feckin jaysus, 'twas the best sex I've had in 25 years! But sure as I'm sittin here, I'll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again!'

(.....a joke not real) :mrgreen:


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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 12:02 pm
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LMAO...Good one :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 12:38 pm
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Seattle AM news This day Reported servailance tapes of after hour RAT infestation at a local Coffee House. STBKS :roll: :roll:


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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 1:35 pm
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As long as we are telling jokes on the Irish (Sorry CC)

An Irish man walks into an Irish pup on a friday night and orders three Guiness'es and the bartender gets him just that.

The Irish man starts to drink one sip of each beer and repeats until he finishes all three, pays up and leaves, leaving the bartender and his regular customer little bit confussed by his behaviour.

The next few fridays the guys comes in at the same hour and always orders three Guinness'es and drinks it the same way.

Finally the bartender decides to ask the fellow why he had this routine and the fellow says: Ay me and my brothers used to go to our local pub in Belfast every friday and drink one Guinness each, but now one of my brother moved to Glasgow and I moved here to Dublin, but we decided to keep the tratition going, so every friday at nine o'clock I come here and order one Guinness for me and one for each of me brothers and they to the same at their local pup.

The bartender and the other regulars are moved by this story and on every friday the bartender makes sure that there are three Guinness'es waiting for the fellow at nine o'clock.

And then one friday night the fellow comes to the bar and the bartender is about to give him his three Guinness'es when the fellow stops him and says:

I will only be needing two this time.

The bartender and the other regulars are bit shocked to hear that and as the bartender is about to lay the two Guinness'es on the table he says:

I am sorry to hear about your brother.

What do you mean. says the fellow

Well I assume that something happened to one of you brother if you are only drinking two Guinness'es. said the bartender.

Ay no, says the fellow. "I quit drinkin'"

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 2:19 pm
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I don't have time to tell the whole joke, so I'll just say the punchline.

"Ay, I don't know where you been, lad, but it seems you won first place!"

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 2:38 pm
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You can go into any Irish themed pub the world over, I guarantee there will be one constant, and that is that there will be no Irish people there.

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 2:55 pm
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I have three contributions to make to this thread.

fendermandan wrote:
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband's libido.. 'What about trying Viagra?' asked the doctor...

A fascinating factoid. All of the Viagra in the whole world is manufactured by Pfizer - in Ireland. I stand to be corrected, but to the best of my knowledge that is absolutely true.

Who'da thunk?

Next. I went to the pharmacy and asked the woman behind the counter; "This Viagra - can you get it over the counter?" She replied; "If you can get it over the counter you don't need the Viagra."

:|

Lastly:

fendermandan wrote:
Starbucks story

On that: going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. You know you're going to get it - but it's going to be rough.

Cheers - C

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 3:17 pm
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Oh Ceri. I am glad that I wasn't drinking anything... like prison for sex :lol:

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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 4:36 pm
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My family on my father's side consider themselves Irish, but I think they hit the islands in 1066 A.D., anyway...

An Irishman is walking home after have a pint (or two) at the local pub, He sees a wee leprechaun that is hanging by the back of his coat on a thorn bush. The man lifts the leprechaun off the thorn and onto the ground. The leprechaun says; "Laddie, you are indeed a fine man, and for helping me I grant you two wishes." The man thought for a minute and said; "I want a bottle of Guinness that will remain full no matter how much I drink." He had no more than spoke when a cold bottle of Guinness appeared in his hand! He drank and drank, and the bottle remained full to the top. After a bit, the leprechaun said; "OK Laddie, you have but one more wish". The Irishman looked at the bottle and said; "Well, how about another one of these!!"


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Post subject: Re: Starbucks story
Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 5:18 pm
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Here's two quick ones:

Q. Where does an Irishman go for holiday?
A. A different pub.

An Irishman walks past a pub...
Hey, it could happen.

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