Sound advice, but take it alittle further,have your pratices,and gigs, but also be sure to take the time out of your life to let your wife due a few things outside the home, while YOU watch the baby. I can guarrentee you that this will not only keep her happy, and give her the well deserved rest she needs, but also give you that special time with your children that lets face it, is all too short.
All this comes from someone who due to thinking about what was important to his ownself missed out on time with his own 2 children. I was lucky though, after 14 months away, I was able to come home alittle wiser for it, and hopefully a better person.

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Thanks for all your advice. There are alot of good points made. I think at this point I should try to play at home when I have an opportunity and try the band thing once routines are a little more established. I think I was getting frustrated due to such a big change. Even though I can't play as much as I would like, I wouldn't change a thing. Only parents know how a child touches your life!

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go buy him a MIA strat now, and give it to him on his 18th.
it could be worth a small bit when he turns 18, or with luck, he might be a
guitar player himself and a 18 yr old mint strat isnt nothing to sneeze at when its a gift.

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63supro
"The good thing is in a club situation, most of the patrons are trashed and really can't tell the difference."

But I see you have time to be on line to wine about it.
I bet you have time to watch the boo tube too.

Look, your a Father now and your priorities need to change accordingly. The old saying goes, you change there diapers, they they change your life, it is the way it's has always been and will always be.

Now, you want to keep playing, good, get a small amp (Like a Champion 600) and play when you can. A headphone amp can do allot to smooth over relations with everyone involved.

Until they get into being a toddler, best to not be in a band, but that don't mean you can go say once a month to the local Thursday night jam and play.

There are ways you just need to reorient your time, turn off the TV, so you can spend it with your honey and your kid.
Turn off the computer for the same reason.

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Marriage is like playing cards...

At first all you want are Hearts and Diamonds.

But in the end, all you really want is a Club and a Spade.

But I see you have time to be on line to wine about it.
I bet you have time to watch the boo tube too.quote]

I am only online during my coffee breaks and lunch at work. I have no time for TV either.

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I was only trying to get you to step back and look how you spend your waking hours, and if you look for it, you will find you can have your playing time and still not loose the important time with the family.

My kids are now 21 and 27 (Years) and I remember how it was an adjustment for me, in the end it worked out for the best.

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Marriage is like playing cards...

At first all you want are Hearts and Diamonds.

But in the end, all you really want is a Club and a Spade.

Balance is required; a person can't spend the same amount of time on their hobbies/passions as they did when they were single or without children.

However, to totally curtail playing is unhealthy, to both yourself and your children. When we completely abandon ourselves, we may think we're "doing the right thing", and to an extent we are. But to walk away from something that is healthy (hobbies are mentally and emotionally healthy & therapeutic) can cause physical, mental and emotional stress; guess who will suffer (besides yourself)?

Also, an entire generation of children (starting in the late 70s) were raised under the notion, "My children are everything, I am nothing..." That produced a generation of self-absorbed jackasses that have to have their hand held and must be praised and applauded for every task they undertake (whether they complete it or not).

I have a cousin that was raised with that ("my children are everything") philosophy, and now he doesn't understand why his boss doesn't give him a raise each time he has a bowel movement. He is unbalanced and unhappy, his parents are unbalanced and unhappy because they missed out of the emotionally healthy benefits of having their own interests and hobbies, and everyone has suffered because of it.

Try this (which worked for my wife and myself when the Armadillo Child was born); arrange for specific times (every few weeks or so) when you can go "play", and write them on the calendar IN INK. That doesn't mean you can't pick up a guitar in between those times, but it means you have a reward to look forward to.

...this works for your wife, too, not just yourself (girls' night out, whatever). Also, don't forget you're still a "couple" and you need to have "date night" on occasion. It worked wonders for our marriage, and helped our attitude about the necessary sacrifices we made.

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Good Vibes To Y'all!



Screamin' Armadillos
Texas Roadhouse Music
Guitar/Slide Guitar/Harp/Vocals

Personal opinions after 3 daughters (all educated, successful, close to their parents)...

Support your wife, over and above all. Change diapers, walk the floors, do the wash...

Play music to your children

Give them all the love and genuine atention you can

Expose them to a wide array of music

Steal 5 minutes per day to play for yourself. If more time becomes available you will know it

Best of fortune.

I'm the father of three sons,all grown now ranging in age from 25 to 32.
I played before they were born and all through their childhood,and now I hear things like "my earliest memeories are of you practicing at night when I was in bed."
Two of them are musicians,one full time one part time....and me....I've been divorced for several years and still play,although I'm not currently in a band.
One of the first things my ex threw at me was "you were always gone playing music"...but at the time she "supported" me.
YMMV

Hey yodacaster

Good advice above from the forumites. Just hang in there things will improve as far as schedule. I have two little ones and know it is tough at the moment and it will get better. I play my DRRI at 2 on the volume in a basement and that seems acceptable nobody is complaining and or waking up. Now I even play open jams once a week. Wife is ok with jam night and practice sessions as long as I am available for her for a movie/date nigh. It was not easy for her because she did not marry a musician, but she adjusted.

With the loud amp you get to learn really fast about superb dynamic playing

Also once your boy is around 5-6 months he will start to enjoy the guitar entertainment the most. You gotta learn a lot of kids songs and get a cheap guitar (you will see why once he is one year old)

Hi Yodacaster, I'd say you have all the time in the world to practice, all kids love bedtime stories, I could sometimes take me 1hr or more of reading some nights, and just when you think it's safe to make your way downstairs the little mite would let you know " I'm still awake you ain't done yet" so you peek round the door and their standing there in their cot with a big toothles smile ready for you to start all over again, the joys, why don't you learn some lullabys, plenty of Beatles song would do the trick I'm guessing, unplugged or acoustic, everybody's happy, you and your kid get to spend some quality time together and your wife gets to relax for a few hours at night, now why didn't I think of that at the time , he just turned 20 it might not be to late ...........Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wing and learn to fly, 20 like it or not he's getting a lullaby tonight, best years of your life ahead man, enjoy, I wish I could do it all again.