The band I'm in hired a drummer, who was a friend of mine, and it ended up not working out. He is a younger guy, compared to us (we're all in our late 40's-early 50's, and he is in his late 20's). It started out ok, but soon he was just in the band to pick up girls (aren't we all), and to party and drink. The rest of us were more serious about playing in a band. I tried to warn him but he didn't think anything was wrong. Well, we ended up having to let him go. The leader of the band made the decision and got to be the one to tell him. Now this drummer friend of mine won't even talk to me, and has avoided all my phone calls. I don't know what the band leader ended up telling him for a reason to be let go, but I'm starting to wonder if the leader put the blame on everyone else just so he could come out of it smelling like a rose.
Anyone else have this happen to them?

_________________
Life is like a sh*t sandwich. The more bread you have, the less sh*t you have to eat.

It's just like breaking up with a girl or something when kicking out a band member...Perhaps the leader told him, its not you, but its not me either, perhaps just to cover his own arse, who knows?

The only thing I have experienced that is sort of similar is the bass player and drummer I have played with in the past are brothers...They got into a drunken fight over something non-band related, but needless to say we haven't gotten together to play since then, and this was months ago.

As far as your case goes, the drummer needs to be able to separate business and friendship, because we all probably are friends with some people we'd never go in business with, and have business associates or co-workers we'd never be friends with. Sometimes you can find people who are good for both, but often times, this separation needs to exist and/or be understood. I might be friends with someone, but if we're in business together, business decisions need to be made in order to do whats best for business and the friendship is an entirely different and separate relationship and neither should affect the other for the most part...

_________________
RAMA LAMA FA FA FA

It's just Rock n' Roll, Im sure He realizes his mistake, hope you guys can mend the fence

Good Luck

Bill

_________________
Hey, Boy Blue is back!

Been in something close to that, I was the one kicked out by the other three.

Long story short, 2 of those "other three" were people who stood up in my wedding, friends from way back, etc.

Those fences have never been mended and that was 20 years ago. The thing that still burns me to this day is all our equipment was stored on the band vehicle, an old school bus. So when they kicked me out they kept all the equipment, even my stuff.

Most of my stuff was used when I bought it, and they were chancing that I didn't have receipts, and they were right. And since the bus was titled in one of their names and parked at one of their homes I was screwed. No legal leg to stand on.

I lost a couple monitors, some Par 64 and 38 lights, two mid and two high end PA cabs, a bass amp, a couple mics and mic stands, etc. A lot of equip went bye bye, and that's why there's no mending the fence. Band differences are one thing, I would have been pissed but could have seen that coming, but the loss of all my stuff was the icing on the cake.

Lucky I'd taken my bass with me after my last gig or they probably would have kept that too. Although I did quit playing for about 18 months after that, kind of lost the interest.

It's all about how the breakup happens, that'll determine the future relationships between former bandmates. There's four of us in the present band, the drummer and I have been the constants for 17+ years, but there's 6 people that have come and gone in that time, and we're friends with all of them. Some were asked to leave for various reasons and some left on their own.

Ah, its just how they see you as a person.

For instance a band i was in had a constant flow of members and we were always good friends (Going to bars and stuff together all the time) and whenever we had to get rid of them for a reason or they left they always hated me and became best friends with the guitarist (Who is my best friend)

I even got him to shout at one of them for stupid reasons and told him to get the hell out the band but after about a week, he went back to my friend told him he's right and and then the band member he kicked said it was probably my fault anyway and then began bitching to my friend about me.

Bands are funny, just get around it and try to find someone who will help you get to wherever you want to get.

_________________
"Oh, it's a windy and sunny day
And I can hear the faint sound of distant waves
The past weeks have been going by so fast
It's all the same, the bright sky and shining sun
I have a feeling it's gonna be a fun day"