My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. A week ago last monday I lost my brother Cancer, He too had lung cancer that spread to his brain. I also had Lung Cancer about 2 years so far so good. I lost my Mother at 13 to Cancer. We realy need to find a cure for this Killer. Take time and greave and remember the good times. God bless you and yours. Your friend Wilbur

I am so sorry. My prayers are with you.


CC

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lomitus,

My deepest condolences for you and your family on your loss.

RK

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RK

2007 Fender Highway 1
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Hello Lomitus,

So Sorry to hear of your loss.

Bill McClellan

Again thank you so very much to everyone for the kind words and thoughts here...I am truly grateful and it does help.

So far the family is doing pretty well...it's not as though this was unexpected or anything so we were all as prepared as anyone could be. We knew it was coming. Personally I had said my "good byes" the night before she died when I had gone out to see her...I knew it wasn't going too be much longer. Being able to be there with my brother and my Dad when it happened was just an added bonus. The coming days and weeks are probably going to be a little difficult as we start going through her stuff but I guess that goes with the situation. The important thing is that again she's no longer in pain and she's at peace. If anything, I feel a bit of relief in that it's finally over.

For the many people here who said they have also lost a loved one to this dreaded disease, please know that you have my deepest sympathy as well. In addition to what my mother has gone through, my wife, my father and my sister-in-law are all cancer survivors and my wife's father died of lung cancer. My family and I have been through this many times so I certainly understand what all of you have been through. Maybe someday we'll come up with a way to beat cancer once and for all...and that's certainly a day worth living for.

Peace,
Jim

Hi again Jim:

Between us my wife and I have done this too many times in the last few years. I've learnt that it is different each time, so there are no rules.

But that "going through the stuff" part that you mention; well that has the capacity to be deeply moving, sometimes unexpectedly funny - but also probably appallingly painful. So you need to win yourself some space to handle it.

Very likely there are folks saying to you; if there's anything they can do just ask. Some of them possibly don't mean it, but many do. I've found it useful to parcel out some of the smaller tasks to those people: so long as you don't push it nice people are usually positively happy to be able to help.

That way you get at least a little room to deal with the important things, and you also connect with others, which is so helpful at these times.

Anyhow. We'll be thinking of you a lot over the coming period. We wish you strength.

Regards - Ceri

I am sorry for your loss Jim.

Hey Ceri,
In fact we've actually been going through my mother's stuff for a couple of months now...ever since it looked like she was going to be in a nursing home for good, so I already do have a fair idea of what we're in for...both sad and amusing. My Mom was something of a serious pack rat and well...the sad truth is she collected a little bit of everything. Sewing machines, beads, music boxes, tea pots, books, broken cigarette lighters, pictures, junk jewelry, pencils, spools of wire, tons of cloth remnants, restaurant menus...it's really quite astonishing. The woman never threw out ANYTHING. We even found two boxes of wrapped plastic cutlery that she had saved from various take out restaurants! LOL!!! The hardest thing so far has been trying to separate anything that might have some kind of value from the stuff that is...well...junk.

Of course, my Dad picked up her ashes yesterday and has them sitting in a box on the bookshelf at the moment so as we're sitting there cleaning...it's like she's sitting there watching us (yea...kinda weird and creepy). I keep hearing her voice in the back of my head yelling "No! Don't throw that out! I'm saving that!!!", LOL!!!

Anyways, we're dealing with it...that's about anyone can do really. We're trying to save things that others in the family may want but a lot of her stuff including her clothes is simply going to either Goodwill or Amvets. Hopefully some "folks in need" will be able to get some use out of some of this stuff. That's what my Dad wants to do and I can't really argue with it. Anything that is of any serious value will probably go for sale on Ebay a little later and the money will go back to my Dad to help pay for some of the various expenses and such.

Alrighty, that's about it for now. Twas a long, hard day of cleaning and tomorrow is going to be about the same. Thank you again for the kind words and sentiments.

Jim

Jim my heart goes out to you and your family. My wife lost here mother on Sept,15 from colon cancer and when she came home from the hospital Hospice did not get here for 4 days and she only made it a week. Like I told my wife I will say to you at least she is not suffering anymore and was surrounded by her loved ones as I know how hard it was to see your Mom in such pain. You and your family are in my prayers my friend.

lomitus, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

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