It is currently Tue Mar 17, 2020 1:44 am

All times are UTC - 7 hours



Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 33 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next
Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next
Author Message
Post subject:
Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 7:58 pm
Offline
Rock Star
Rock Star
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2007 9:44 am
Posts: 7282
Location: Washington
If I could walk that way, I wouldn't need a doctor.

_________________
Member #26797
My other guitar is a Strat.

Image


Top
Profile
Fender Play Winter Sale 2020
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 10:01 am
Offline
Professional Musician
Professional Musician
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 16, 2008 1:53 pm
Posts: 1037
Location: Southeast Missouri.
A thousand words can be said for a single picture...

Image


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 2:07 pm
Offline
Rock Star
Rock Star
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 16, 2007 3:47 pm
Posts: 4294
Location: Somewhere near Seattle
What's the difference between a musician and a savings bond?
One of them eventually matures and earns money.

_________________
"is that a real poncho...i mean
Is that a mexican poncho
Or is that a sears poncho?
Hmmm...no foolin ...." FZ


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 2:27 pm
Offline
Hobbyist
Hobbyist
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2008 3:38 pm
Posts: 51
Location: NJ
Rocker_Gamma wrote:
A thousand words can be said for a single picture...

Image


Ladies and Gentlemen: The NEW Jethro Tull! :lol: :lol: :lol:

J-Tull is awesome. I saw them with Peter Frampton August 8, 2008 at the Mann Center in PA.

_________________
ImageImage
Image


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 5:19 pm
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2007 10:55 am
Posts: 302
Location: Oneida, NY
OK.... Again, apologies to all you animal lovers.... but here's the joke anyway:

A guy is selling his house and showing another fellow around the property. They get to the back yard and the buyer sees a tombstone in the corner and points it out.
"Yeah," the seller says, "That's where I buried my dog."
"Old age?" asked the buyer.
"Naw.... I had to shoot him," the seller confessed.
"Oh...... rabies, eh?"
"Nope..... he started banging on the piano and howling every night about 3AM. I've got to get my sleep in order to get up and go to work.... and the neighbors started to complain."
The buyer said, "Well....... I wouldn't have shot MY dog."
The seller replied, "What did you expect me to do? Shoot the piano? How would that've solved the problem?"
"No, but...... what I meant was......."
The seller piped up, "Besides, I've saved money on dog food AND a lot of energy!"
"I understand the savings on the dog food........ but WHAT energy?"
"Heck.... you have any idea how much digging it takes to bury a piano?" :lol:


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sun Aug 24, 2008 1:19 pm
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:36 am
Posts: 885
Location: South Carolina
a blonde who looks like a playboy model is driving in her pink convertable, when she looks out and sees another blonde in the middle of a weat field, in a row boat, trying to make it move with the paddles. The blonde in the car stops, gets out and yells "what are you doing?", the blonde in the field replies "duh, SEA of wheat!". The other blonde yells back "you stupid blonde you!, this is the reason people have all those jokes about us blondes being so dumb! and I tell you, if I knew how to swim, I'd come out there and kick your butt right now!"[/i]

_________________
I got nothing.


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 8:22 am
Offline
Rock Icon
Rock Icon
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 16, 2007 6:51 pm
Posts: 25353
Location: Witness Protection Program
Why don't cats play poker in the jungle?

-Too many cheetahs :?

_________________
Being able to play and enjoy music is a gift that's often taken for granted.

Don't leave home without it!


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 8:37 am
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2007 10:55 am
Posts: 302
Location: Oneida, NY
The one and only time I ever flew in an airplane, I jumped out ~WITH NO PARACHUTE~ and (obviously) survived........


But then.......


It didn't hurt much......


Since the pilot had already taxied into the terminal.... LOL :roll:


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 2:50 pm
Offline
Professional Musician
Professional Musician
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2007 6:11 pm
Posts: 2621
Location: Sunny So Cal
Where do M & M's go to get a drink?


A candy bar
:D

_________________
"Life is like eating jalapenos. What you do today may burn your arse tomorrow"
Image


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 2:57 pm
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 3:45 pm
Posts: 320
Location: England
Whats blue and square and in disguise

An orange.

No complaints now it'smy birthday


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 4:18 pm
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2007 10:55 am
Posts: 302
Location: Oneida, NY
:lol: Happy Birthday...... ya' silly goof..... hehehehe, ODD sense of humor, but I like it! :twisted:


Now... for a little (very little) erotic ethnic humor:

Why do Asian men get horny when they vote?



Because for them it's always an Eeee-Wreck-shun! :P


(Baaaaaaaad Pun, I know.... I KNOW! hehehehe) :oops:

& don't say that's a 'naughty' joke...... as if a guitar isn't Phalic..... duhhhh


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:15 pm
Offline
Roadie
Roadie
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jan 27, 2008 1:41 am
Posts: 201
Location: Canada
"Knock knock"
"Who's there?"
"It's your mom."
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

_________________
"The truth is just a plain picture."


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Oct 04, 2008 9:39 am
Offline
Professional Musician
Professional Musician
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2007 1:27 pm
Posts: 1151
Location: In.
Okay, heres one.
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license
to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my
wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and
come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my
curly silver hair.

She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and
she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office.

She said, 'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too.'


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Oct 04, 2008 12:07 pm
Offline
Aspiring Musician
Aspiring Musician
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2007 10:55 am
Posts: 302
Location: Oneida, NY
Randy1: GREAT! .... and soooooo funny, because.... it could be true! :lol:

Odd thing about that.... it reminded me a bit of my recent visit to the SS office as I'm "at that age" as well and all I had with me to prove my age WAS my driver's license. Sadly, my (empty, but for a few old photos) wallet hasn't been seen since. I checked back and they said it wasn't left there, so I must have lost it right after my appointment. Who ever found it probably thought the old "raincoat" that's been in my wallet for years was usable........ hahahahahaha :P I'd say, when the baby arrives and he's ordered to pay child support, THAT will be what he gets for not turning it in to lost & found! :twisted:

Yes, it cost me $15 to replace my license and not being more aware or careful. He probably was ticked that there wasn't any money in it and tossed the rest in a garbage can. I have little doubt my wallet &/or its contents are in a landfill somewhere...... bummer. :x


Top
Profile
Post subject:
Posted: Sat Oct 04, 2008 12:36 pm
Offline
Professional Musician
Professional Musician
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2007 1:27 pm
Posts: 1151
Location: In.
Guitarman1117 wrote:
Randy1: GREAT! .... and soooooo funny, because.... it could be true! :lol:

Odd thing about that.... it reminded me a bit of my recent visit to the SS office as I'm "at that age" as well and all I had with me to prove my age WAS my driver's license. Sadly, my (empty, but for a few old photos) wallet hasn't been seen since. I checked back and they said it wasn't left there, so I must have lost it right after my appointment. Who ever found it probably thought the old "raincoat" that's been in my wallet for years was usable........ hahahahahaha :P I'd say, when the baby arrives and he's ordered to pay child support, THAT will be what he gets for not turning it in to lost & found! :twisted:

Yes, it cost me $15 to replace my license and not being more aware or careful. He probably was ticked that there wasn't any money in it and tossed the rest in a garbage can. I have little doubt my wallet &/or its contents are in a landfill somewhere...... bummer. :x


Yeah, I thought that was funny also and although I haven't yet reached that age I know several people who are approaching retirement age and I sent that joke to all of them. Sorry to hear about you lost wallet, but whoever got it will likly get what they deserve someday. :wink:


Top
Profile
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 33 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next
Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next

All times are UTC - 7 hours

Fender Play Winter Sale 2020

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron